By Darla McCorkle/Columnist
At Tuesday’s budget workshop it was boasted, “Sue me! I’m ready!”
Many moons ago I worked at a defense litigation firm. All we did, all day long was defend people who had been sued. There was no “if you win, we win” ambulance chaser stuff. It was all billable hours. I worked under the senior partner and billed more hours than our associates some years.
My then boss told me a couple of things that have stuck with me.
First, anyone can sue anyone for anything. You can sue Jesus Christ, but getting him served is the hard part. The more people you sue and the more claims you make, the better chance you have something will stick and there will be plenty of pockets to pay.
Second, he warned, if you decide to sue someone make sure the potential awarded amount is worth three years or more of your life. Lawsuits bring chaos and negativity. Even if you are right and deserve money the process can be grueling. I know I used to send out that chaos to plaintiffs. So, if you were hit by a Coke truck, it may be worth the pursuit, but most individuals carry minimum coverage insurance and have very little worth fighting over in assets. And really what amount is worth dealing with someone you loathe for years?
In my opinion, the angry little fella that stomps around town doesn’t have anything I need. Hugh may feel differently. I view most people who throw fits in public like I view toddlers. There’s no harm in letting a toddler throw a tantrum. The harm is if you reward the bad behavior. While I can influence Hugh, ultimately Jefferson is his problem not mine. I don’t live there. I don’t own property there. I don’t have a business there. He has all those things. So, what he wants to put up with is up to him. Which is probably a good thing because I often give an inappropriate response to folks ranting and raging. To me, it’s kinda funny to watch. Like, I keep waiting on the little fella to have a nose bleed from high blood pressure or have a stroke at the podium. My dark sense of humor imagines the few people in the room that know CPR doing a game of rock paper scissors for who has to help Bubba’s Little Helper. The winner trying not to win begging, “best 2 out of 3?”
Angry, aging, white males who just can’t wait to tell someone off having a stroke or aneurysm mid rant has been my intrusive laughable thought since those days at the law firm. Some people imagine people naked during public speaking or tense situations, I imagine them stroking out. If they drone on, as we all know happens at that podium, I would imagine them being forced to be a woman for a month. Thinking about some smart mouth man covered in age spots trying to navigate a tampon always bring a smirk. Especially in this day and age, because those old dudes really struggle navigating this new world where no one gives a damn about them anymore and we all just sorta view them as the guys that messed up everything.
I hope I’m at that meeting if one of these angry old guys drops, though. Not to see anyone die, but just to see the rock paper scissors game over who is gonna save him.
From the podium someone made the request for council to maybe inform citizens how they can help the city generate revenue. The example was given that Jefferson’s Tourism Board President, Colleen Taylor, was over or handled Hotel Occupancy Tax and she did that for free as a volunteer.
First, are y’all out there thinking that Colleen is going around to the BnBs and asking for their HOT money? Like, she just picks it up and deposits it and that’s how she comes up with the Tourism Budget? Do y’all think she has the authority to go demand a BnB pay past due HOT tax? She does not have that authority. She could send a general reminder of protocol to pay but she isn’t supposed to be sending out any sort of demand letter for payment. She isn’t the city attorney, she isn’t the county tax collector, and she isn’t an employee designated to collect tax. If she is sending a demand letter for payment under her name, she shouldn’t be, and I hope anyone who gets such a letter will file a complaint against the city for allowing it, or asking her to do it, when they know she shouldn’t be. To quote the Attorney General’s office on the matter, “Tourism boards …may receive and spend local hotel tax revenue allocated by a city or country to promote tourism, but they have no legal authority to assess, audit, or collect the taxes from lodging businesses.” That means she shouldn’t even be looking at or comparing amounts paid or who paid them because that’s an audit. I don’t know who does this for the city. They do not have a city tax collector but regardless of who does it and how, it’s not volunteers. But I’m sure the comment to use volunteers was just a facetious one made to imply maybe volunteers could do tax collecting better.
Which, can I just say this about snide remarks from the podium about people not doing their job or implying how you believe things should be or how you would change those things when you don’t know the basic information, can put a wedge between our city and county. Yeah, your words can cause a problem where there is no problem. Know what else it can do? It can cause those two entities not to want to do the things they do for each other. I’m not sure some of you realize how little the city can afford own its own, or how much the city piggy backs on the county for things. And that’s good because that means it is running smoothly. It would not run smoothly if the city had to start doing those things for itself. In fact, I’m not so sure the city could actually afford to go out and get the educated licensed staff, the actual office space, the equipment and software, the legal storage requirements and all the things they’d have to run out and get to do things the country currently handles for them. And sure, the county gets paid for doing those things, but it is PENNIES compared to if the city had to staff and house and do it themselves. So every single time someone stands and almost strokes out demanding someone’s job or head on a platter, there are more things to consider than who you dislike this month or who hurt your feelings or who made you mad. The city has outstanding taxes owed, sure, but that amount, if collected, wouldn’t cover the cost of staffing their own tax collector’s office and doing it themselves. The city can’t even afford upkeep on city hall and now can’t afford to demolish it or build another. The city can’t keep the streets department staffed. I’d hate to see a citizen’s mouth and irrational tyrant type demands cost them more than just the 3 minutes of being forced to listen to it.
See, tax collectors are certified, educated individuals. They adhere to state and federal law. So, when you pay your taxes or when a store collects a tax on goods you bought, those taxes are sent to a collection agency office who will then issue Jefferson a check for its portion. However, even this could go wrong if an entity overpaid that agency and requests a refund of the overage. Jefferson is currently in such a situation because a refund was given to a business for sales tax and Jefferson has to return their portion.
Further, let’s go ahead and address treating all citizens equally and the I pay my taxes why don’t they pay theirs chest pounding. While in spirit the “all citizens should be treated the same” rhetoric sounds noble, you do understand that is just a phrase to stir you up, right? If you gave it just a little thought you’ll not fall for it. Think about it. Who in our society to do we have separate laws for to protect them? There are pesky laws in place that dictate citizens are NOT the same.
For example, those burdensome handicapped folks? They get bigger bathroom stalls and better parking. You may want to make it so those freeloading disabled folks have to tell you their disability or have to park where everyone else parks, but that’s not up to me or you or any local level government. Certain citizens were given protections and benefits from the federal government and from the state they reside in and you not liking those benefits or protections doesn’t erase them. See, because the federal and state level of government knew that any buffoon could get elected to a city council or a county position, and they don’t allow those protections to arbitrarily be jacked with by a mayor or a council member or especially a concerned citizen. I know, it’s hard to hear! I mean, churches are the same way! Out here being exempt from taxes but can settle pedophile priest lawsuits by the millions! Or how about those veterans? Even if their job provides medical insurance they can go to the VA for care! Even if they are making good money, they get to use the VA, all because they served our country?
Yeah, that’s exactly how it works! No one asked me or you for our approval. None of us gets to try to change those federally mandated statutorily outlined benefits even if our Christmas wish, or our campaign slogan is for everyone to be treated the same. You aren’t a child and I won’t hold your hand to walk you through this. This is called critical thinking and you’re an adult and should be using it. Don’t be misled by anyone making blanketed remarks that are fairy tales. Anyone trying to tell you everyone should be treated the same is using persuasive rhetoric that baits you, they wish to make you feel angry about being treated differently. Don’t fall for it! We have laws in place to protect people who are different in some way. Like, your granny is protected from some crook trying to take advantage of her because of laws protecting the elderly. A person with a disability is allowed a service dog when dogs aren’t allowed, because we protect the disabled.
I know some of you really, really, want to be able to be a super sleuth and expose the truth, but you don’t matter. Just like I don’t matter. It doesn’t matter what you think or believe as it relates to another person’s property taxes. You are just a regular citizen and even if you were a big and strong council member or even an elected official, you are not the designated tax appraiser or collector.
If you want to rant about it you can. But, the fact is, you lack the knowledge, education and certification. The council meeting last Tuesday is a glaring example of why they don’t give those jobs to just any aging buffoon who manages to get elected or any angry little elf who loves to rant. The federal and state government knew that certain things couldn’t be left up to local government without strict guidelines, certification requirements and oversight. Our laws outline a way to collect taxes on a federal and state and local level because to not do so would mean absolute tyranny from any person who managed to get elected or snag a job in local government.
Lastly, I have to ask, how did they spend so much time “investigating” yet get so much information wrong? Some of you may not know but this “investigation” that’s been going on just to be able to do the half witted presentation we saw, was in the works for weeks and weeks, and months and months. This months long investigation with daily calls and visits resulted in the most basic of information being wrong. Hugh only has one property with a homestead attached to it. His name is on the house I live in that’s in Texarkana, but it is not homesteaded. If his name wasn’t on it I could’ve put it as my homestead. This is easily accessible information. And I know calls to the county in Texarkana have already been made to find out about the property I’m at. So either they didn’t ask if it was homesteaded or they stood and lied saying there was a homestead on two properties when that’s not true.
I mean, my goodness, how can an investigation reveal the wrong amount of taxes due? We requested an audit of our file, by the way. So not only did they inflate the number they got that was wrong when they got it, but turns out it’s a lot less. Like, taxes due will not cover a fraction of what the city needs and will be pulling from reserves. But this is why we don’t let volunteers play pretend tax person. Buncha folks trying to be what they aren’t qualified to be. If they can’t be trusted to find basic information that is publicly available, I’m not sure I’d trust their interpretation of tax code. But then I wouldn’t have let them come in my office every day for months bullying me.
People only act the way you allow them to act. Match their energy and then some. A bully only bullies people they perceive as weaker than them, or lower than them. Either match their energy and get in their face, or if you are worried about the gun they may conceal carry then tune them and their threats out and imagine them trying to navigate being a woman or stroking out at the podium. It works for me. I bet it’ll make ya smile, and maybe by the time you smile they’ll have shut up.